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Jangan Menolak Lamaran, Kalau Tidak Ingin Musibah Datang

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Medianda – Sahabat medianda Jodoh manusia tidak ada yang tahu, dengan siapa kelak berjodoh dan kapan jodoh itu datang.



“Apabila seseorang yang agama dan perilakunya bisa kalian terima meminang putri kalian, maka nikahkanlah dengannya. Jika kalian tidak melakukannya, maka akan menjadi musibah di bumi dan kerusakan yang nyata.” (HR. Tirmidzi).


Demikian hadist yang diriwayatkan oleh Imam Tirmidzi sebagai peringatan bagi kaum perempuan yang menolak lamaran.

Mengapa lamaran begitu penting dibahas, sehingga Rasulullah sampai dengan tersurat bersabda. Jelas saja, karena tanpa lamaran mustahil sebuah pernikahan bisa dilangsungkan.

Sahabat medianda lamaran adalah perbuatan serius yang dampaknya bisa berkepanjangan. Akibat menolak lamaran seorang pria yang shaleh, bukan hanya dirasakan oleh wanita penolak lamaran, tetapi juga oleh keluarga dan masyarakat sekitar.

Apalagi jika seorang wanita menolak lamaran karena alasan yang tidak dibenarkan dalam syariat Islam. Akibat buruk dan mengerikan atas tindakan itu, merupakan peringatan tegas dari Nabi Muhammad SAW 14 abad silam.

Saat ini fenomena penolakan lamaran sudah bukan perkara yang langka lagi. Kerap kita mengetahui penolakan lamaran oleh sebagian kaum wanita dengan alasan ‘ekonomi.’

Bahkan penolakan-penolakan tersebut sering didukung oleh orang tua si wanita atas nama “Melindungi putri kesayangannya dari ketidakbahagiaan di kemudian hari.” Ironis.

Orang tua memang memiliki hak untuk mencarikan jodoh. Tapi jodoh yang dimaksud adalah sosok yang shalih dan baik akhlaknya. Ia sama sekali bukan anjuran untuk menolak seorang laki-laki baik-baik dan berniat sungguh-sungguh hanya karena urusan fisik-duniawi semata.

Jalan tengahnya, harus ada tindakan produktif dan bijak dari semua pihak; baik dari wanita yang dilamar, orang tua atau wali, dan laki-laki pelamar.

Bagi kaum laki-laki yang mengajukan lamaran, shalih dan giat beribadah memang utama. Namun jangan jadikan hal tersebut sebagai alasan untuk bermalas diri untuk memenuhi kebutuhan finansial, fisik, dan sebagainya. Bukankah setelah menikah bukan cinta yang kita makan?

Bagi wanita dan orang tua atau wali, hendaknya melakukan komunikasi secara intensif agar penolakan yang bermaksud baik tidak membawa pada kehancuran, sakit hati sang pelamar dan fitnah seperti yang telah disampaikan Rasulullah SAW.

Jika memang seorang lelaki yang datang ke rumah untuk melamar memang masih berpenghasilan seadanya atau bahkan belum mendapat pekerjaan, padahal ia shalih dan baik akhlaknya, berlapang dadalah untuk membantunya. Sudah banyak kisah seorang laki-laki yang belum bekerja, padahal ia sudah berupaya sungguh-sungguh, justru mendapatkan banyak peluang dan pekerjaan yang mapan setelah menikah.

Percayalah, dengan niat lurus untuk menikah, Allah SWT pasti akan memberikan bantuan dari arah yang tak disangka-sangka. Wallahualam. []

Semoga bermanfaat.




Sumber:Wajibbaca
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